A Lesson From My Mom—When You’ve Got Nothing Left, This Is How You Find a Way

The Memory That Hit Me Hard

I was driving back to St. Louis from Chicago—normally, I’d fly, but for whatever reason, I decided to drive. I had just wrapped up a Saturday workshop for a group of hungry real estate investors looking to grow their business. As I’m driving, I pass this Long John Silver’s. Instantly, I feel this warm wave of emotion hit me. You know the kind—like an unexpected hug from the inside. I’m smiling before I even realize it, even chuckling a bit.

But just as fast, that warmth is gone, and I feel a heaviness settle in. Tears start falling before I even know what’s happening. All because of a fast-food sign?

Here’s the thing—it wasn’t just any fast food. It was Long John Silver’s. You know, the “seafood” restaurant. If you can even call it that.

Growing Up with Sacrifice

Growing up, we didn’t have much. Dirt poor, really. So eating out? That was a rare treat. And my mom—God bless her—she loved Long John Silver’s. I have no idea why. Maybe it was the hush puppies? But man, I hated the place. Fought her tooth and nail to go anywhere else. She always let me win. She’d give up what she wanted just to make me (and others) happy. That’s just who she was.

That memory hit me hard today. Maybe it’s because I’m getting older and I’m just a few years younger than she was when she passed. Or maybe it’s because, earlier that day, I stopped to charge my car and saw a woman who reminded me of her. That same worn-down, tired look—the kind that runs deep.

What Resilience Really Looks Like

That sign opened the door to memory lane, taking me back to all the times she sacrificed for me. Like my 8th grade graduation, I was so embarrassed to walk across the graduation stage in my worn-out, tattered shoes. I whined about it for days, knowing we didn’t have the money for new ones. But on the morning of my graduation, there they were—brand-new boots at the foot of my bed. She made it happen. I still don’t know what she sacrificed to make it happen, but somehow, she always did… every time.

That’s what resilience looks like. When you’ve got nothing left, you find a way.

Tough Times in Real Estate Investing: Finding Your Way

That’s true in life, and it’s especially true in business right now. The real estate market? It’s tough out there. The economy’s shaky, laws are changing, and everything seems to be shifting under your feet. But these are the moments that define us.

You’ve got to dig deep, especially when the path ahead feels uncertain. And trust me, I’ve been through it. It’s during those tough times that I’ve learned the most. The challenge? I didn’t always realize it in the moment. But looking back, those hard times? That’s where the real lessons were hiding.

Lessons Learned: Gratitude in Hard Times

Now, whenever I’m going through a rough patch in business—or life—I try to face it with gratitude. I don’t always know what I’m learning in the moment, but I do know that down the road, I’ll be thankful for it. Is it easy? Hell no. It’s tough to be grateful for hard times. But knowing that “this too shall pass” gives me a sense of calm and keeps me grounded.

How to Push Through When You Feel Stuck

1. Focus on what you can control.
   Laws, the economy—they’re always going to shift. Don’t waste energy on what you can’t change. Double down on what you can. 
2. Get creative with your resources.
   When things are tight, that’s when you need to get scrappy. Look for opportunities in places you wouldn’t normally think of. Innovation often comes from limitations. Automation, like what we’ve built into REI BlackBook for example, can help you get more done with less.
3. Find Your Tribe.
   Running a business can feel lonely—most of the time, your friends and family just don’t get it. They don’t understand the late nights, the stress, or the risks you’re taking. That’s why it’s so important to find people who do. You need to connect with those walking the walk, who know the highs and lows of being an entrepreneur. Trust me, going it alone is the fastest way to burn out.
   
   Your tribe is out there. It’s the group that gets your challenges, celebrates your wins, and shares your struggles. If you’re looking for that support system, I’m a bit biased, but REI Connect—our tribe—is a great place to start. And if you’re serious about building real connections, REI Bootcamp happens twice a year, and it’s the perfect opportunity to meet like-minded investors face-to-face. Your tribe is waiting for you.
4. Be grateful.
   I know it’s difficult to be thankful for hard times, but those challenges are where the growth happens. Facing them with gratitude helps you stay calm and grounded. Later, when you reflect, you'll realize those tough moments taught you something valuable—even if you couldn’t see it at the time.

My mom taught me that. She faced every hardship with grace. So, when you’re staring down those tough times—when everything feels heavy and overwhelming—remember, you’ve got more grit than you think. What’s your next move? How are you going to push through? Because in the end, it’s not about having all the answers—it’s about showing up, digging deep, and finding a way forward, no matter what.